An old song (She still moves me and dares me to believe)

PLANS- the Track Record

"It's so crazy how suicide occupies the minds of so, so many happy people
Don't lie you know you've thought about it, we all have
Part of growing up is asking questions

Isn't it mad weird how our wildest dreams tell us about our fears and what we want out of this life
Some say that it's healthy to experience breakups, mistakes, letdowns, or the death of a loved one

We owe all that we have to the people in our lives
We can only hope that this song reaches you in time

(Two pairs of eyes share a beautiful silence
Perfect weather breeds perfect smiles
So show me that face when you can't hold back yours
Plans to wake up on the beach
You know how it feels so fucking awesome when a song lets you know that you're not alone
Well these 3 minutes will beckon you too think, dance, live, learn, teach, and love)



So i'll meet you in front of Hagerstown at 10

And we'll live for the single moment
I swear i will hold you
On this bathroom wall forever
I promise not too hold this grudge against you
if you love like you've nothing to lose
I swear i will hold you



We owe all that we have to the people in our lives
We can only hope that this song reaches you in time"

Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, whatever thought is on your mind,
I Hope it finds you well.
More then well,
I Hope it finds you Alive and well-

The purpose of this life is to truly live- -

The Track Record- Plans (to wake up on the beach)

2nd wind

There is no other sporting event I enjoy more then the Tour de France.  The race is epic and challenging to say the least; it is torture at best.  Through picturesque countryside, riders traverse an entire country in 21 days of racing all by the power of their own two legs.  Wow cannot begin to describe it!

For such a race, there are great stories.  Each day is filled with triumphs, overcoming, Hope and heartbreak.  Similar to the recent soccer world cup, there are rrepresentatives from all over the world.  It is beyond category!
My favorite stories are the ones of courage and passion, or, as the Italians call it, panache!  The days where a rider breaks away from the pack all day and wins the day in front of his compatriots or when a rider finishes the race despite a crash that would put most in the hospital for a month.  The stories of true grit, and never giving up.  Of setting your sights on a goal and reaching it no matter what.
This years tour has been full of such stories.  Even today, Lance Armstrong attempted to win the day by riding over four mountains solo to the finish over one hundred miles.  He did not make it.  However, his effort was valiant and had all the fans reminiscing about his wins just a few years back. 
But it was truly the attempt that took the most courage and gave everyone, especially Lance, a reason to Hope.  This is every bit a parallel to real life.  We are more then halfway through summer.  For many their have been great struggles, beautiful and equally gut wrenching stories, reasons to Hope and reasons to doubt.  Yet it is in the attempt, in the saying "yes", in the moving on, even if that movement is at a crawl; it is in these things that our stories are truly made complete. 
In endurance sports, after the rush and speed of the opening of a race, or a long mountain climb, an athlete is said to get their "second wind".  A rush of adrenaline and strength that leads them to get back in the hunt or otherwise continue on towards the goal. 
My Hope is that,
wherever you are,
 in reality and passion,
in spirit and in truth,
that you are on your second wind, or quickly approaching this renewal, while keeping an iron focus on the goals of Life and Love.
This is not just my Hope, but it is also my belief.  I know that you will find that strength, from deep within, and when you do, know that you are courageous and lovely, a bright spot in a universe that would sometimes seem against all that is good and true.

It may not start with moving all the mountains in your life,
but it may just begin with YOU.

Listen:
josh moore- "too good to be true"

Dedicated to Vino'- for second wind, and second chances...
(photo courtesy of Graham Watson)

My Hope resides, the children are...

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2390/1515342953_4d17f59a3b.jpg
When I go running, or biking for that matter, I don't think about anything but the task at hand, the physical effort, and the temporary escape from the busyness and/or stress from life.  That's why the people I meet along my "me time" best be pretty special... and of course, many times they are.  The natural highs associated with physical activity are really helpful to anyone in life and I find after adventures on the roads or in the woods, I am often better able to Love and be loved in this hectic life we live.  So it is always a pleasant experience to find something breathtaking on the trail or in another adventurer.
  After a recent run I stopped at the track to watch the descending sun caught up in fast moving, eastward bound storm clouds.  Upon walking back towards my car, I spotted a large man and a little girl walking just ahead of me, in the same direction.  The man was strong and tall, and had multiple ear and facial piercings.  The little girl was probably around five or six and was wearing a black summer dress.  The man was intimidating, the little girl was not.  It was some kind of contrast,
while here I am, skinny runner boy, coming up behind them.  But the part of this picture that was most striking was what the little girl was doing.  She was picking up pieces of trash and empty bottles.  Not just a couple here and there, then moving on,
She was picking up every single piece of trash within eyesight!
Not only that, but the impending figure of a man (i presume her Dad) was in charge of holding all the junk she found.
It was quite a picture.
I was moving at a faster speed then the two of them, so I was about to pass by and jump in my car when I decided, maybe to spare Dad some work, or maybe because I was motivated by the little girl; to start picking up any of the pieces on the other side of the path she had previously missed.  After collecting a number of pieces, I proceeded to walk by, and without a glance back, to smile, toss the trash and start my journey home.
But before I could ponder the equally captivating little girl and the light cascading through the clouds, I heard the little girl utter something to the effect of,
"hey daddy, he's helping too"
This scene just made my day for SO many reasons.  For the beauty I didn't expect to find, for the motivation of a young child, for the apple-of-his-eye type feeling the girl gave to her dad and for the innocent Hope of a child.
All of this coming in a town where the elementary school provides the motto,
"Here, the children are our future"
Yes, they are,
and,
if this little girl is any prediction of that,
I am not only excited, but I am awe inspired;
and on a stifling afternoon when I went out looking for a little run in the woods,
...I found my Hope renewed.

That we may all move like this...

Listen:
Joel and Janna- anyway (check these people outski)

freedom and us

"freedom isn't free"
and
"the only thing needed for evil to succeed in this world, is for good people to do nothing"

Are two quotes that come to mind on this 4th of July 2010.  The first quote in particular often connotates a military notion, that we must pay for our freedom with blood, sweat and sacrifice.  The second confirms this notion, that good men (and woman) have to step forth to push back the forces that seek destruction and pain in this world.  Yet we very seldom live this way.  We have come to a time and place where we cannot see, except through military means or media, the brutality and the struggle that is at play in a world gone mad by the hunt for power and advancing oneself over one's brother (or has it always been this way?) and here in America we have a very small glimpse of what it is to fight for freedom (except our first hand military warriors).  But we are not completely free as you suppose.  There are many, many people in this country who do not feel free.  Perhaps this is because real freedom, in its simplest, yet deepest sense is neither free nor evil, but rather infinite.  The real freedom our hearts seek can only be found in the simplest of truths and a child-like sense of wonder.  Freedom can only be found in Truth; and Love.  Freedom goes beyond a feeling, relationships, or political control, but rather a sense of belonging to a larger story and leading an existence that is found deep within, so deep that it may only correspond to your own Hopes, Dreams and Experiences.
And it is a battle, a struggle.
It is a lifelong venture.
Freedom is not free.
Nor is it easy.
But "we owe it to ourselves"
and...
"we can't just let it go"
Our entire existence depends on freedom and the pursuit therein; yet it is only a select few who choose to seek and defend it.  We all have a part to play in this, in every word we say and every action that stays.  Let us seek the truth, absolutely, and in doing so, let freedom ring, and let infinity answer the call of the feeling we are truly after.  At the end of the age, freedom is not a right, but rather a precious gift, and as such amazing gifts are, it is not to be kept to ourselves.    
The choice to pursue freedom is of such earth shattering importance,
that all of our lives hang in its balance, as do the words nobody ever wants to hear,
"it didn't have to end like this"-

listen:
anberlin- we owe this to ourselves (King)

fall away * * line

I had this idea.  Call it a catch phrase.
You know those lines in movies- the lines where everything relies on that moment; the in or out, the win or lose, the love or leave line...
or even the line your friend gives you before leaving that you just needed to hear "one" more time
or
that word that "makes your day" at Dunkin donuts as the sweetest lady in the world pours your coffee again.


Edward Bloom "they say when you meet the love of your life, time stops.  What they don't tell you is that when it starts again, it moves twice as fast to catch up" [Big Fish]
A phrase of spoken word that hangs in time, as fireflies dancing on an August evening or the PA announcer letting the crowd know the home team has won, the title, again.
Andrew Largeman "Yeah, the ellipsis, it's dumb. It's dumb. It's an awful idea. I'm not gonna do it, okay? Cause like you said, this is it. This is life. And I'm in love with you... [Garden State]
Our lives are made up of hundreds upon millions of these lines.  'Lines and phrases like knives" as Anberlin says.  In a world of busyness and technological miracles, it is our words that still carry the most weight in our thoughts and feelings moving from one person to another, most often spoken word, but written as well. 
So it would be good then to remember how important this is and to think before we speak, because just as a few words can finalize a brilliant story or seal the deal on an epic romance, lines can also break hearts and crush dreams.  May your lines today and all days carry the Hope and Love of your favorite lines, and may you slow long enough to see the "fall away lines" that make our days and may even make up the very people we are today.  We all have these lines and we all have stories worth telling.  Share or remember the lines that make them move; today.
Charley Waite "Be seein ya, Sue"[Open Range]
listen:
Josh Moore- Shadows in the Dark

"let him without sin, throw the first stone"

long enough to be felt

"to love someone means to move" fr. Guissani

(foto courtesy TWLOHA.com)

Our words need actions to come alive.  Even the greatest word s, faith, hope, love, truth or the ever more majestic words, like triumph, correspondence, enamored, devotional- they all need some sort of action on the other side to make them come ALIVE.  
  There is a big difference between knowing something, having it in your mind as true and real; and believing or rather feeling something.  I know my mom and dad love me, but sometimes I don't feel like it (same for myself in regards to them).  I believe we know a lot of things in life, but it is becoming increasingly difficult in the crazy and fast paced life that we live, for us to allow ourselves and others to feel these things we speak on and believe so well.
Sometimes in our conversations and interactions, we (and I only say we cause I frequently do this) look right past the person speaking and think about something we are doing later or maybe what we are going to say in reply.  It is hard not to, right?  Or, even worse, in a Christian sense, we rush our friend speaking on the issue at hand or cannot make time for them altogether because we promise, "oh I'll just pray for you, later".  Of course prayer is important, rather, it is essential (Luke 18:1), but it is not nor has it ever been a scape goat.  We still need to move.  We need to remain, true to what comes up, over and over in our hearts.  Especially when we don't feel like it. 
I think we have a natural connotation to put things in order, place value on our relationships; preferences.  We would rather hang out with him or her, rather go to the concert instead of the dinner, rather be with friends instead of at the family reunion, rather turn off my phone when I know my friend wants to talk...
and yet the type of love that we are to move in, the kind of love that still loves in this broken world, the unconditional love, the truest sense of this glorious four letter word, is still possible.  Even today, even in this very moment.  But we have to let it go.  We have to let it return.  We have to place it in our minds before we go to bed and let it rise with us in the morning sun- We have to let go, and let Love.  It is possible.  It is crazy, it is daring, bold and trans formative, it is real.  It looks different for every single person, and it just maybe the hardest thing in the world, maybe even harder then bungee jumping, Tour de Francing, or storming the beach on D-Day facing emanate death at the hands of evil manifested in human form. 

What does it look like to give ourselves over to Love?

and can we stay with it, with you, long enough to be felt?

"because I know, what its like, everyone that I know, every place that i go, every story that I'm told,
It's love, love, love, it's love, love, love, that we're lookin for"

LISTEN:
mat kearney- "everyone I know"

presence: Part II

In the last post I spoke about companions and shared a little bit about the companions I have been so fortunate to have in my life.  The companions I have and the companion I am leads into this next idea of presence; that we can be in a place, in different places during a day, yet we may not actually "be there".  Companionship is so great and so important because it allows you to share your heart, to share the very essence of life and living.  It may actually slow life down, slow it down to allow you to breathe, to laugh.  But this is under duress.  Companionship and slowing down enough to grab a cup of coffee with a friend is becoming more and more difficult.  We are Moving TOO fast people!  One issue I see with this is the fact that we can be in different places and do different things over the course of a day and yet not really think about anything we have done or witnessed.  We are not present in the very life we are living!
  There is a scene in one of my favorite movies, Garden state, where Andrew (Zach Braff) has just finished telling the story about how his mother became paralyzed when he was a child.  The scene is set as four people are sitting by a fireplace and the only light cascading through the room is the lit place in a giant, yet otherwise empty living room.  Andrew is sharing the story with everyone, but Sam (Natalie Portman) is the only one really paying attention (they have all had a little to drink).  As Andrew finishing telling the story, Sam asks a striking question,
Sam: You're in it right now, aren't you?
Andrew Largeman: What?
Sam: My mom always says that, when she can see I'm like working something out in my head, she's like, 'you're in it right now' and I'm looking at you're telling this story, and you're definitely in it.
Our lives and our relationships are lived out in reality, but sometimes we get so into a moment, usually from the past, that we exit the reality we are in.  The thing that is neat about this, is that, even though we are simultaneously in two places, in one story, while sharing the same story or moment, those listening are focused on us and this part of us we want to share.  We are "in" one story while living another!  Yet the reality of it is that we have to be present to be in either or rather, both. 
  A great priest once said (Fr. Guissani) "to discover Christ as a presence, we must first come to the conclusion that Christ is indeed, present".  Jesus may be the best example of a presence.  He was always in the moment, so fired up, so focused.  We should be as such for those around us.  Human connection is one of the most sacred and amazing gifts we have to share in this life, and even with the best companions in the world, your presence is still required to live out and enjoy this story; to be "in it". 
  Never underestimate the power of presence.  Entering into a place, a situation, a relationship, or continuing into an existing one, means so much to the people around you.  I had the opportunity to see an old friend recently.  And although we have not kept up for awhile (yet hopefully will this summer!) my presence at his house made hm extremely happy and I believe, was a bit of light for a few of the other guests at the party, especially the kids.  Although it was a different setting then I was used to, my presence was needed there, and, as the band Sleeping at Last puts it so well, "the Light that we hold (EVERYONE HAS THIS), must be buried, buried to Bloom".

Dear__________________,
Welcome to summer.  I'll be voyaging with you the entire time.  Your presence is formerly requested at the rope swing, the mall, the beach, work, the bike race, the family barbecue, the trip to New York, your birthday, the fireworks, camp, your nephews house, a mountain hike, and on and on...
Will you choose to accept?  Will you meet me there?

Your gracious companions,
Infinity, Destiny, & Yahweh

listen:
Brooke Fraser- "CS Lewis song"